Archive for April, 2006

What a difference a week makes!

Well, I’m home from the surgery. It went so much better than last Monday’s.

Of course, I didn’t have full anesthesia or any work done on the lymph nodes. But I’m still pleased with how well it went.

But, I’m also exhausted (sedatives do that!), so will sign off now…

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Recovering

Laurie’s surgeon just came out to tell me that everything went fine, and apparently pretty quickly. The status board showed surgery starting at 11:50, so it took less than 30 minutes.

More when I know more, probably when we get home.

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Back in Surgery

Laurie just went back to the operating room for her follow-up surgery. The last thing she told me as they wheeled her off was “blog this”. Since she said it about ten times in a row, I guess she really meant it!

They are just excising a bit more at the front of the lump, because pathology showed cancer at the front margin from the last operation. It should be very easy on her compared to last week. No general anesthesia, just heavy sedation.

I’ve been told to expect to next see her about 1:30, plus or minus a lot, so I’ll post whenever I get any new information.

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They make balls round too?

Okay, nothing to do with cancer, but…

I was born and raised in Gainesville, Florida. Charlie and I may have met there when we were two or three years old and definitely met there years later in grad school. We have a total of 4 degrees from the University of Florida. And we’re wondering what tens of thousands of UF grads are wondering.

What’s with these round balls?

It’s gonna take some thinking, but I could probably get used to a sport other than football at UF. It’s a good thing I did my undergrad work at an ACC school!

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So I’m not SuperWoman

Well,

I’ve had to face that miserable fact that I’m not SuperWoman. Sure, chemotherapy was rough, but I was in class every day afterwards, except for the first time. (And I missed class after my first chemo because I wasn’t sure how I’d be affected and it was easier to cancel classes than wait and see how I’d feel. And it was Veteran’s Day and, dammit, I should have Veteran’s Day off.)

But I had surgery a week ago and just got back to classes today. I wasn’t sure if I’d be ready to go back to school the day after I got out of the hospital, but I was sure I’d get there at some point last week. But no. I was off a whole week after surgery. And I reallio-trulio didn’t feel like going to class today. Unlike those times I’d feel the need to just force myself through the chemotherapy exhaustion, I would have been quite happy to stay curled up in my recliner all day.

Now, getting out and seeing the folks at church was wonderful for my spirit yesterday and if I had any sense, I wouldn’t have objected to going to work so much, but, well, who says I have any sense?

To my dismay, it was probably very, very good for me to go back to work today. Having to talk to people about what was going on forced me to find an approach other than the miserable self-pity I’ve been wallowing in. I mean, does anyone who asks how you’re feeling really want to know the constant pain that drains cause? Do they want to know how p.o.ed I am that I have to go back and have more surgery Friday since the pathology report showed cancer at the margins (even there is officially no cancer in the lymph system–something that wallowing in self-pity keeps me from being ecstatic about).

Com’on…as you’re reading this, all this whining is a bit much, isn’t it? I mean, this is happening to me and I find the last paragraph a bit tedious.

So instead I talked to real frat boys about projectile vomitting and compared notes on the “balls” we’re carrying around with other members of the department (yeah, I’m the only female faculty member, so I hadn’t been able to discuss this sort of stuff with them before). So I did refind my bad sense of humor and it’s been that bad sense of humor that’s gotten me through so far.

That, and the prayers and concern and support of dozens (hundreds?) of people. And I was reminded at church yesterday and at work today that I still have all that as well.

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